We’ve never done this before, transition to adulthood

One of the great questions in our culture at this time is, “When is someone an adult?” We seem to have no clear rite of passage. Old expectations have quickly lost their power. Those transiting from adolescence to their twenties and beyond are entering an unknown world.

Cultural shifts, technological advances and financial uncertainties have resulted in a general fog of understanding related to becoming adult today.

How do young adults navigate in a world of unending options, high expectations and confusing messages? How do parents help prepare and support their children in becoming adult?

Having spent many years working directly with young adults and their parents it may be helpful to get an outside perspective.

A healthy goal for parents to set early is one related to, “establishing a sense of family that will result in positive adult to adult (after the kids are grown) relationships.”

Some of the factors to consider in understanding the situation are:

  • We seem to lack any clear “rite of passage”
  • Culture is shifting quickly
  • “Extended adolescence” seems to be the new reality
  • The system that parents “became adult” in is likely ineffective to meet the needs of today’s young adults
  • The transition has implications for the entire family

Possible responses for exploration with a coach are:

  • Gain an understanding – of the uniqueness of the family and its members
  • While the young person is in high school – consider post-high school options, balance of dreams and practical realities
  • Post-high school – be intentional about relationships, decision making, support realities (financial and other)
  • Beyond – exploration of expectations related to (as appropriate) career, location, getting established and marriage

A life coach can help all involved 1) evaluate their unique family dynamics, 2) define an agreed upon hoped for future for the family, 3) establish a plan for supporting each other on the journey and 4) providing alongside support on the way.

Contact me to begin working together for the good of the entire family. http://jimschmotzer.com/services/life-coaching

 

 

Jim Schmotzer & associates

November 2011

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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